Thirty five seconds is entirely too short of a period to wait for a server 
to exit.  Instead, make a valliant effort to make sure it exits, and only
give up after a very long period (arbitrarily chosen as 15 minutes).

In addition, if we're being asked to restart the server, then don't try
to start again if trying to stop the server failed.
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Return zero by default, when the script exits.
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Set return-/exit-value based on whether we successfully dealt with the 
PID-file.
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Don't wait that long if the program we're waiting on exits.  It 
should only exit if the server is not going to be started.