a.k.a. Bug#7975 deadlock without any locking, simple select and update

Bug#7975 was reintroduced when the storage engine API was made
pluggable in MySQL 5.1. Instead of looking at thd->lex directly, we
rely on handler::extra(). But, we were looking at the wrong extra()
flag, and we were ignoring the TRX_DUP_REPLACE flag in places where we
should obey it.

innodb_replace.test: Add tests for hopefully all affected statement
types, so that bug should never ever resurface. This kind of tests
should have been added when fixing Bug#7975 in MySQL 5.0.3 in the
first place.

rb:806 approved by Sunny Bains